Today I had to make a choice. My daughter has been wanting and outdoor game for three years now called Ladder Ball. Really there isn't much to the game at all, you have two small balls on a string and you toss them at a "ladder" depending on the rung you hit determines your score.
I finally broke down today and bought the game for her. She has three brothers but they are grown adults and don't live at home so she has no one to "play" with. So knowing better than to do it hubby and I went out to play the game with her. Now my right leg and back hurt so bad I can hardly stand it. The upside to that is that she had a blast, it was good to see her laugh and play and just have fun like a kid should.
It's terrible for her that my disability has affected her so much. I've hated for her to be out of school for the summer. We live in a rural area so it's not like friends can just walk over to our house for a visit or anything like that. It's terrible when children are made to grow up to fast for things they have no control over. She has been a jewel through all of this and has rarely ever complained about anything.
God blessed us in giving her to us to be our daughter. Someday I'm going to find a way to make this up to her. I don't know when or how, but I'm going to find a way. It's not that I feel I owe her nor does she feel that way either, I just have a desire to do something really special for her for all she has given up gracefully to grow up faster than she needed to and to be such a help around the home.
I do hope though that as she grows up and moves on with her life that she doesn't look back and regret her childhood, that would destroy me.
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